Well it's late and I can't sleep. I normally don't have a problem with this, but there is so much happening in my life that I can't shut myself down at night....at least not lately. So tonight as I was laying in bed figuring out how to process everything.....I decided to write or in this case blog. And I'm about to share right from the heart....nothing unusual since I do this all the time.
But here it goes: Change. I love it....I really do and I feel that this season we are coming into has the most beautiful change you can ever hope for. It's the kind of change that sometimes takes your breath away. I like change, every form of it actually. What's the motto, if your not changing your not living?? Well I agree with that. Some change will be good and some won't. But what I realized is that this coming week for me represents a lot of change for me. 8 years ago there was a change that took place and it forever changed the course of my life...at the time I thought it was for the best.....5 years later it turned out to be the worst change in my life. A year ago I made a big change and ended a friendship with someone who had been nothing but hurtful in my life. At the time that decision to make that change I thought was so hard, so upsetting in my life but looking back over the last year I've realized that it was the best change I could make. Not having that person in my life this past year was actually allowing me to "live" and to really see things for what they are, trust people for what they say and learn more about me as a person then I could of ever if I would of kept that person in my life. I don't doubt that something in the coming week will happen that will be all about change. Just seems to be that time of year.....but this time I'm good with it.
People come in and out of our lives for all sorts of reasons and what I've grown to realize is that I hold onto nothing because it can be taken away in a single breath. I've learned to stand tall, speak my mind, think before acting, smile when there is nothing else to do.....and pray. I spend a lot more time in my car even though I "get to work from home." Because of being in my car more it means a lot more time to think...to process....to understand. The other day I opened myself up to a friend for just some encouragement and what I got back was total frustration. Actually how this person responded made me realize that this person really never cared about me as a person but to bring me down because they where unhappy with their life. Normally in a situation like this I would write the person off but this time.....this time I took it for face value and moved on with life. Life won't stop, never has stopped for anyone and that won't change.
I understand that a lot of this tonight is ramble to many-but that's ok with me, because right now it's what I have to get off my chest and out of my mind so I can sleep tonight. I'm always changing, I work in an industry that is always changing, my beautiful daughter is always changing, my day to day life is always changing and I am great with that. God never promised an easy life, I don't believe things need to be easy. But he did promise that He would get us through it. So I look at it this way, I might struggle, people will hurt me, I will have trials and uncertainties but no matter what He'll get me through it. Big or small, doesn't matter the problem.....that's pretty cool if you ask me!
Well I think I'm tired enough to stop....you know the whole "stop while your ahead...". Don't be afraid of this season your going through, there are good things to come from it. That's a promise.
